Coming out to your parents is hard and I agree. But I think before you come out of the homosexuality closet, come out of the atheism closet first. For example

“Mom, dad. I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I…I don’t believe in God. I think he hates me and I think I hate him back.” And then you can casually slip it in…”Oh, and I love cocks.” Then let them pick the lesser of the two evils.

Because look, pretending to believe in God is way easier than pretending to be straight. Because unlike pretending to be straight, pretending to believe in God does not require you to have an erection when you don’t have one. But most importantly, pretending to be straight requires you bear silently while your best friend wears socks and sandals and orders beer when you’d rather chop his legs off and order a cosmopolitan.  

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