I guess Billy Joel said it as best as can be
She can kill with a smile
She can wound with her eyes
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies
And she only reveals what she wants you to see
She hides like a child,
But she’s always a woman to me
On this day 3 years ago, I met who I still regard as prettiest girl I have had the pleasure of knowing in all my life. And it’s been a great life thus far, partly because I did in fact meet her.
It wasn’t love at first sight, it wasn’t even the first time I met her but it counts as the first of many coffees we had together as teenagers and continued to till we were both legally allowed to drink alcohol. She of course got there before me, in a rare first and also a clever reference to the sex we began having a few months later.
But let’s not skip ahead. This is the story of how I met her, not how I later fucked her. And now I suddenly feel like Ted Mosby, a feeling no straight man should ever feel.
So yeah, it was Christmas eve, 2009. I had just turned old enough to be able to drive, a couple of weeks back. I was yet to discover my element and no, that’s not a double entendre. You see, shortly after, I transformed from this chubby guy with few marketable skills and fewer achievements to show for my 18 years of existence into a Greek god (her words, not mine). I wrote a book, became lead vocalist in an amateur band for a short while and developed a cutting edge, sarcastic sense of humor that to this day, I regard as my greatest accomplishment in my 4 years of engineering. There was more, but I think I just heard my modesty yell “Oh, for crying out loud!”
At this juncture, I’d like to clarify that for the purposes of this blog, I’m a glorified and fictionalized version of myself. And this girl I speak of, exist purely in my imagination. She knows who she is and I’m pretty sure sooner or later she’s going to read this.
So getting back to the Christmas eve of 2009, I met her for a couple of hours at a local coffee shop, walked around on the streets of Colaba till she had to leave and I was faced with the realization that it was over and that my world as I knew it would forever change into a magical ride of things I thought only happened in really cool TV shows like How I met your mother (I was 18, shut up. You felt the same way too)
A few months later, actually, 70 days later on the eve of Valentine’s day she asked me out. Here’s the story of how that happened, in verse.
Twas’ the eve of Valentine’s
And I had yet to dine
I was out with a girl that night
But such was my plight
That in spite of my awesomeness
She had found it all too less
She plucked my cheeks and called me cute
But I couldn’t help but feel like a prostitute
Maybe I wasn’t good enough
My clothes were dirty and my hair, rough.
We were at Costa’s at Inorbit
With a guy who looked like a hobbit
Little did I know that he was just the third wheel
Because the girl wouldn’t let her feelings unveil
She fancied me, with all her heart
And was just waiting for me to do my part.
But that one night she couldn’t hold back
That awesome girl, with an amazing rack
She told me how she really felt
Skeptically, I asked if she had miss-spelt
She said she couldn’t do that to me
And my hart jumped and leapt with glee!
That pretty girl had become mine
Twas’ the eve of Valentine’s
Zindabaad! Zindabaad! Aye mohobbat zindabaad!
Btw, throughout that winter, I was convinced that “the hobbit” had a crush on me. It was shamelessly obvious from his flirty texts.